Lindsay Perigo
Lindsay Perigo

The Politically Incorrect Show - 22/05/2000

[Music - Die Fledermaus]

Good afternoon, KAYA ORAAAA & welcome to the Politically Incorrect Show on the free speech network, Radio Pacific, for Monday May 22, proudly sponsored by Neanderton Nicotine Ltd, the show that says bugger the politicians & bureaucrats & all the other bossyboot busybodies who try to run our lives with our money; that stands tall for free enterprise, achievement, profit & excellence against the state-worshippers in our midst; that stands above all for the most sacred thing in the universe, the liberty of the human individual.

[Music up, music down]

For the second time recently, I went on strike over the weekend, avoiding radio & tv & the newspapers. I spared myself the moanings of the morons who think they own Russell Coutts & Brad Butterworth, & remained blissfully ignorant of the shenanigans in Fiji. Instead, on the spur of the moment, I jumped on a plane to Whangarei to attend a fancy-dress party at Hooch Helen's Hideaway some twenty-five minutes' drive out of the city.

I'm afraid many of the details of the occasion are now somewhat blurred, but even the copious quantities of red wine have not diminished the images of the nun with the enormous breasts & goatee beard, or the friar who heroically took it upon himself to keep the bonfire that was keeping us all warm piled high with manuka & gorse while his frock billowed perilously close to the flames. A special hit was Zorro, an overseas visitor with movie-star looks who set many a heart a flutter, brandishing his sword & leaping athletically hither & thither in his black cape. (In fact many of the guests were from overseas, independent spirits craving the lifestyle removed from bureaucratic interference that Hooch's Hideaway affords.)

A special treat was a hot bath in the open air at two in the morning with a new young friend who, while not explicitly a libertarian, is decidedly so in spirit. He is especially eloquent in his denunciation of the totalitarian regime of Fidel Castro, having spent some time in Cuba. We luxuriated in the hot water under the stars, imbibing some more red wine & sharing our dreams. Later still, after everyone else had gone, we rejoined Hooch & listened to some Mario, revelling in the unashamed, sincere sentimentality of the lyrics of songs such as Danny Boy, And This Is My Beloved, Wanting You & The Desert Song. The next day, yesterday, the three of us drank a toast to good old-fashioned romance in a wonderful cafe called Reva's, prior to my reluctant return to Auckland & the moaning morons.

Hooch has great plans for her Hideaway, not the least of which is the setting up of a school where children will be taught in accordance with libertarian & Objectivist principles. If reason & freedom are to have a future in this country, this project will be of paramount importance. It's the sort of venture that the much-maligned members of our so-called "rich list" would have embarked upon already, had they a clue as to what is needed to change our prevailing ethos from being anti-achievement to pro-achievement. Hooch is not on the rich list, but such is her passion & tenacity that I've not the slightest doubt she will fulfill this particular dream, & I look forward to being a part of it.

In the meantime, as a gesture of gratitude for a memorable weekend, for the supplying of a tonic to this battle-weary libertarian just when one was needed, for everything she has done & will do in the cause of freedom, I bestow upon Hooch Helen the Free Radical Award.

[FreeRad Award]


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